Butterflies

May the wings of the butterfly kiss the sun
And find your shoulder to light on,
To bring you luck, happiness and riches
Today, tomorrow and beyond.
~Irish Blessing

Sometimes I feel as if I am reaching. Reaching for things to make me feel at peace or calm my sorrows. When the wind blows and I imagine it to by my Wyatt rubbing my cheek, or when I find a penny lying on the ground and I jump for joy at the thought of a simple gesture sent from the heavens. I realize that most of my family and friends believe it to be my way to grieve and they simply support my thoughts, and I'm okay with that notion. I have to do something to overcome the darkness and make my way to the light, and if imagining things will help me then so be it. I will leave it up to you to call it what you will, but for me it's faith.

Butterflies are my newest obsession. I had always thought of them as beautiful creatures, but I had never paid much attention to them other than trying to chase them as a child. Butterflies are known for eluding capture with grace and ease. However, as of late, we have had some very interesting encounters with the beautiful beings. The butterflies have found a way into our hearts and we have welcomed the advancement. I will divulge all of the details of our butterfly experiences in a few separate stories below.

1. Lyla and I took a trip to the mail box (quite a walk from the house) one day about a month ago. On the way back  she announced that there was a bug on my back. So, of course, I quickly glanced back with a bit of terror in my thoughts. To my surprise, there was a beautiful butterfly on my shoulder. I continued to walk. The butterfly left my shoulder and landed on various other parts of my body, all as I continued on the journey towards the house. We both giggled at the interesting creature as it encircled us. At one point the butterfly landed on my foot and stayed still long enough for me to capture a picture.

2. The very next day, Lyla and I were out watering the flowers when a butterfly made its way to my baby girl and landed ever so softly on her forearm. She chuckled with excitement. We both stood with silence as we watched it open and close its wings. Eventually, we went on with our watering, and our new friend took flight.

3. I received an email from my great aunt a few weeks ago and I will include an excerpt from that email. (I had yet to tell anyone of my recent butterfly encounters).

"When I built my house seven years ago, few trees were left and there was no shrubbery to attract butterflies and bees. But a couple of years ago, in the spring, I noticed a while butterfly -- just the one. I thought of it as my sister's soul and it was a comfort to me. This spring, for the first time, I was surprised to see a smaller white butterfly fluttering alongside the larger one, and I immediately thought of your little Wyatt."

4. As I was browsing Facebook recently I came across a post from a former co-worker. This sweet lady and her husband had lost their little girl almost 4 years ago. She lived a beautiful life for 39 days. I will include the details of her post below:

"So I wanted to share my hubby's post but for some reason it wouldn't let me share so I'm copying and pasting it. This is not the first time this has happened either, about 3weeks ago while golfing 3 butterflies landed on his hat and wouldn't leave him alone. The other guys he was golfing with even said that it was the strangest thing.

Dan's post:
So my beautiful wife Lisa (who I call my butte...

rfly) believes that when a butterfly lands on you, you are being visited by a loved one that has left this life to go and be with our Lord. Well today I believe I was visited by my little angel Jazmyne "Jazy". I was sitting outside work and a butterfly was flying around me for a few seconds then landed on my hand for a minute or two. I was able to bring the butterfly up close enough to look in "her" eyes. It really did put a smile on my face. I love you so much Jazy and miss you like crazy! ;-)"

Mommy, Daddy, & Sweet Jazy



Baby Jazmyne



5. Waylon was outside doing yard work when he noticed a butterfly land in one of our blackberry bushes. He slowly walked over. The butterfly spread out its wings, and he was able to rub it! He was able to pet a butterfly?! Yes.

Okay, so if you think I'm crazy, you are more than welcome to stop reading. With that said, I now feel excitement and joy when I see butterflies. One more coping mechanism? Maybe. But I have to believe that it's something more.

We had been making plans for a memorial garden for Wyatt since after the funeral. We had received an overwhelming amount of stones, plants, and outdoor decor as gifts from friends and family and wanted to put them to good use. We wanted a place that we could go to simply sit and think about our baby boy; a place all his own at our home. We threw around many ideas and were almost set on one when the butterflies began to make their appearance. So a memorial garden in the shape of a butterfly it was!

The outline (with big sister doing her part)

Time for the mulch

Lyla testing out the stepping stones

A dogwood and a butterfly

Azalea, thermometer/rain guage, and stone

Rose plant

"Your memory is my keepsake, with which I'll never part. God has you in his keeping, I have you in my heart."

"Sweet little flower of heavenly birth, you were too fair to bloom on earth."

An airplane birdhouse

The finished product (for now)

Beautiful and graceful, varied and enchanting, small but approachable, butterflies lead you to the sunny side of life. And everyone deserves a little sunshine. ~Jeffrey Glassberg