Amazing Faith

I am human. God made me that way. He gave me the ability to feel all emotions, including anger, skepticism, and jealousy. How I choose to corral and show those emotions is up to me. From the day our son was taken from us I have had a difficult time professing my faith and"giving all my troubles to Him." I am mad. I am sad. And although I know I will NEVER understand, I keep searching for answers. My soul feels damaged and I feel certain that I am being punished. Me. Me. Me.


I still believe. What helps me to carry on in search of peace and hope amidst the shadows?

I've said it before-- but this wasn't about me. Wyatt has touched the lives and hearts of so many people. People of all ages, races, religions, and ways of life. I'm not just spouting off at the mouth to make myself feel better about this idea. I have been shown time and time again from relatives, friends, or fellow bereaved parents that Wyatt has changed hearts and minds of people...some complete strangers. This week I was shown an unwavering faith by a young girl appropriately named-- Faith. I don't know Faith well, in fact, she wasn't even sure if I remembered who she was (of course I did!). However, she is quickly becoming one of my favorite little people.

With her mother's permission I would like to share an email from this sweet girl that not only brought tears to my eyes, but a big, giant smile to my face:

Dear Miss Krystal,

hi, im faith~dawn's daghter. i am 9 years old, (about to turn ten in sep., i was exited to hear lyla and me were born in the same month!) and i read your blog, along with my mom. my mom told you about her 2 miscarriges, and i know my brother and sister are playing with your sweet baby wyatt right now. i know they love him lots. i know your email must be full, but i have wanted to email you so badly. your blog is amazing in ways i can not explain. your family is in my prayers everyday, and they continue.

i remember a sunday morning, when my family was sitting in the balcony, and i looked at you and lyla smile. that memory comes back to me constanly. your bright blue eyes send happieness through my heart.

i have recently read the "am i still a big sister?" post, and it is amazing your words are in the perfect place in every sentence. lyla has a beautiful face and i truly adore her. she is a golden child.

my mom has told me about the butterflies when i was toddler. the day i read your post about the butterflies i went outside with maria and a butterfly almost landed on my shirt. i went inside with joy, shouting, "wyatt almost touched me!" then one day i went to carowinds with my best friend for my first time. that day was special, and i thought of you and your husband constantly. when we were going back to the car to eat lunch, i found one shiny present, a penny. a perfect penny. i put in my pocket and told my friend about wyatt, and im sure i will tell her more, he is just to perfect to stop. then when we went to ride the rapids, and butterfly landed next to my shoe, i bent down and looked at it, just spelling the name wyatt in my mind. 4 days ago, i was outside helping my dad and a butterfly landed a 3 feet in front of me. i moved to it and it almost touched my foot. i noticed it was blue on the end, the color of your eyes.

i love your blog. its like you are talking to me. my penny jar grows and grows. i will send you a picture. there is a poem that i wrote that you will see on the jar. its not as good as yours though... anyway wyatt is awlways in your arms miss krystal, always. you have 2 children. maybe not in your home, but always in your heart. i am going to read your blog today, i promise. thank you for reading and sorry its so long. oh and my first boy i ever have will be named wyatt.:) i love him. i cant wait to read your next post. thank you.


faith victoria

 

WOW.  Right?!

 

If that precious email doesn't give you hope for the future, I'm not sure anything will. This little lady's testament helps me to believe that our Wyatt's life wasn't in vain and that even though it has come at great expense (our expense), good things are happening because he existed.

 

Faith has shown tremendous faith. At the young age of 9 (almost 10 ;) ) she is able to not only understand the scale of such a situation, but to strive to do something about her feelings...not to mention the fantastic writing ability that's behind those keystrokes!

 

I replied with this:

 

Dear Faith-

 

Thank you so much for taking time out of your day to email me with your sweet thoughts. You are so very sweet to keep us in your prayers and to think of our family often. You are one special little girl yourself, you know. :) I, too, remember seeing you in church and can remember that you always had a beautiful smile on your face. I admire your ability to understand the magnitude of our loss and to feel the need to make contact with me. It takes a lot of courage and kindness to write the things you have and to think the thoughts you have. Your compliments are too very sweet and you made my day a whole lot brighter by reading your email. :) You are an amazing writer at the young age of 9 (almost 10) and I believe you will become even more amazing with time. I hope that you have a great start to the new school year and keep that fabulous attitude that you have shown through this email. You have a very kind soul. Much love to you, sweet girl.

 

Krystal

 

 

And the last response that I would like to share from this amazing child of God:

 

 

Dear Miss Krystal,

Thank you for emailing me back, I greatly appreciate it. I keep reading your blog, and it's amazing. You are such an amazing writer, I want to be an amazing writer just like you when im older. I talk to your Wyatt in my prayers. He has touched so many people in this world, your son as changed so many lives, your son is a blessing to you, and so many other people. I am going to make a picture of Wyatt's name and an airplane. It will be next to my bed. My mom said that it was so sweet that you would want to include me in your blog, and she says yes,its okay if you use my email. She will call you soon. I will send you a picture of our penny jar, and heres a little poem I wrote all by myself! :

Dear Wyatt,
your home is in our hearts,
you and me, we'll never
part. your still living, sweet as can be,
just not down here, not with me.
your mommy and daddy need a smile,
go stop and visit them, and stay for a while.

There's the poem. It's not as good as you but i tried! Anyways tell Mr. Waylon that I pray for you and him, and tell Lyla she is ADORABLE!! And Miss Krystal, your such an amazing person. I hope you are having a good day, and I will pray for you and your family. Thank you for reading, and my mom will contact you.

 

 

 

Faith- I want to thank you again for all of your sweet comments as well as the bravery you have shown by reaching out to me. Your writing is awesome, and your poem is perfect. Keep up the good work...I have a feeling you will be rewarded for your kindness and love for others.

 

 

I simply HAD to share this with the world. If someone as young as Faith can see clearly in troubled waters, then what's stopping the rest of us? Although, I am FAR from healed, I am pleased to say that every little smile helps, and Faith provided me with a whole bunch of 'em! :)

 

Faith has shown me how amazing faith truly is.